i found this at Fara's notes.

Men Are Impossible to Please:

If he calls you and your phone is off or you dont reply, he thinks you’re cheating.

If u TREAT him nicely, he says u are TOO IN LOVE, moving too fast.

If u Don't, he says u are PROUD .

If u DRESS NICELY, he says u are trying to LURE other men.

If u DON'T, he says u are RURAL.

If u ARGUE with him, he says u are STUBBORN, too manly.

If u keep QUIET, he says u have no BRAINS, a walkover; If u are SMARTER than him, you’re a SHOW-OFF; If he's SMARTER than u, he is GREAT.

If u don't LOVE him, he tries to POSSESS u; If u LOVE him, He takes you FOR GRANTED, (very true huh?).

If u tell him your PROBLEMS , he says u are TROUBLE; If u DON'T, he says u don't TRUST him.

If u SCOLD at him, u are treating him like a CHILD; If he SCOLDS at u, it ’s because he CARES for u. If u BREAK your promise, u cannot be TRUSTED; If he BREAKS his, it is circumstances beyond his CONTROL.

If u do WELL in your career, it's LUCK ; If he does WELL, it’s definitely BRAINS.

If u HURT him, u are CRUEL; If he HURTS you, you are too SENSITIVE !!

and its totally true!